closer

Once, a good friend of mine, gave me a great compliment. She'd been there for me during a few tough breakups, and remarked how resilient I'd been through the dating ups and downs she'd observed.  She said that she was impressed that I'd been able to avoid the bitterness or anger that sometimes accompanies having your heart broken. She also mentioned how my approach to dating was to give most guys a fair chance, even if they were not exactly what I thought I was looking for.

 Now this friend of mine is naturally a supportive, optimistic, kind person - for which I'm grateful because I really needed it at the time. And while I'm sure she was emphasizing the good, while ignoring some of the bad, I hope those qualities are. at least in part, true.

It's funny, but beyond the basic requirements of mutual attractiveness (which includes being active and somewhat fit), sincere effort to live righteously, and the ability to be kind and patient with me, while spoiling me once in a while (which I admit, are some big "basics") - the guys I've dated haven't fit some certain mold. Their hair color and height, age, career and money, interests, personality, background, and goals have all been varied and diverse.

 I'd like to hope that I'm open-mindedly picky. And somehow, I've been lucky enough to have picked some quality guys whom have come and gone out of my life, many of whom have remained "friends" - as in the occasional facebook message, and even sincere invitations to come to their receptions.

I'm just hoping that one of these times, when I find myself dating someone whom I least expected, it'll be right. I'm looking forward the joyful moment when I realize, "Oh, this is the reason why it took so many tries to get it right. I should have been looking for someone like him all along. Or, more realistically, I should been more patient when it didn't work out with all the others, because he is the right compliment to me, and no one else was quite the right fit at quite the right time."

And while I'm still pretty clueless about what the "right fit" will feel like or when "right time" will be, I'm optimistic that I'm closer to figuring it out... one more friday night date, one more awkward munch-and-mingle, one more "put myself out there", one more "risk my heart" at a time.